Monday, October 03, 2005

"Don’t ever change."


About six years ago I wrote one story. The main character (portrayed myself) meets a girl of his dreams on one night. At the end of meeting that girl asks me ”don’t ever change”, just before vaninshing into mist. So what about now, did the fearful change occur? Well yes. Some things changed and some things remained. But the meaning behind that request was not about general change. It was about certain idealism. That too, changed a lot. It went upside down but remains of that idealism still exist – perhaps the ones that survived were not idealism at all but something much deeper.

It is very difficult to walk to that bridge again. To see that shadowy figure standing there, to approach her in complete silence. Words would feel utterly meaningless. Holding her in darkness would not do either. This time I would look - my eyes would burn through mystery, through uncertainty and through change. And I would love what I would see.

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